I know, a it’s a big understatement to say the title so lightly because we need a lot of things right now – some so big they seem out of reach…like a vaccine for Covid-19, for the world’s economy to bounce back flawlessly without making any new people sick or harming the environment, no? Hey – a girl can dream…
I think it might be better to just focus instead things we can fix/tweak/address while we wait on these big ones to happen. As we wrap up our monthly focus on the podcast about looking into your own life right now, let’s identify some of the typical needs we are all having right now.
- The Need for Calm. From being quarantined with multiple family members or roommates to living alone, I dare to say just because you might have finished Netflix and are bored, that doesn’t mean you feel calm. As I’ve been talking about on the podcast, there is so much anxiety, a daily influx of changing information and real fear about life and money. We need to mindfully infuse calming moments and self-care to balance all the bad.
- The Need for Centering. This means taking time each week to get grounded – and ramp up your spiritual practice or just solitude and relaxation without any stimuli. Yoga, prayer, meditation, a hot bath, a serene walk, deep breathing or nap in the back yard are some ways to decompress. The key is no active mind thinking. Just being and allowing.
- The Need for Structure. I know I’m always talking about boundaries, but we cannot do self-care to meet our needs without boundaries around our time and space to do so. Nor can we feel grounded and glued together without negotiating boundaries with others around activities and responsibilities. Trying to do it all creates anxiety and anger – not calm. Also, creating some boundaries when it feels there are none helps you to honor yourself. Helps you to be in choice.
- The Need for Hope. We can only go so long without knowing there’s a plan to make things better…and in this case we are still waiting on science for part of it and good leadership for the other half (knowing when to reopen the economy in my country). It can feel very vulnerable to rely on other humans to make it happen for us, and I think it’s helpful to create our own hope. This can be just journaling about the silver linings of this awful time, or how you want to live differently going forward. Seeing the good happening around us helps too. Having this to look forward to can be restorative.
- The Need to Feel Loved and Comforted. We are all missing people we used to see and maybe even got to hug. Right now, we need to both show as much love and comfort as we can, and to receive it. Just Because. Because this is a scary time, because there has been some real trauma and loss, and because we feel so powerless and fragile most days.
There may be many more needs you have identified for yourself that I left out. If you haven’t already, visit the podcast episode on needs from last year. If you have, that’s good, because that means you are in touch with what’s going on for you. Just remember that some needs we need others to fulfil (like a hug), and some we meet for ourselves via boundaries and self-care.
We all need so much right now. My hope is that you take time this week to try to identify, and honor, what you need.