Why Authenticity is Also About Finding Purpose

Today on the show, and all month, we will be talking about why having a sense of purpose is important for our mental health and overall self-confidence. In my experience, it is a part of the work that shows up for almost every client I have worked with, and yet it comes a bit later in the personal growth process, and I think there are reasons why.

Over the years when working as either as a counselor a coach, I have noticed that clients, after they’ve done some deep work around healing old wounds, setting boundaries, and getting rid of shame, come into more self-love and self-acceptance. They then want more out of life because they’ve been uncovering and remembering and accepting and even liking their authentic self. Since a big part of their true self is often what they’re good at and what they love, what they care about and why, I think it’s understandable that now they want that to become real in their life. They want to finally honor themselves and have lives that reflect who they truly are on the inside. It seems to be a way to also make up for the years of hiding their talents, doing and being what others needed them to be, or just allowing the fear and perfectionism keep them from trying.

It’s as if that sense of purpose is one of the final puzzle pieces that my clients grapple with, finding and where to put it.  When we do the healing work and when we validate what happened to us and what didn’t happen for us, (and we’re not crazy) and what we feel and think and need is valid, we start trusting ourselves more. We feel more secure within ourselves. We make more sense once we own what we’re passionate about and what we’re talented around and what we were naturally drawn to, and what we have experienced.

There’s that desire to be a better person. There’s that need to have meaning and purpose in their life. They don’t want their life to feel shallow, they don’t want it to feel numb, they don’t want to feel like it’s just based on things or achievements or status or things that they find shallower, I guess. They want deeper and they want more meaningful, and they want a lot more substance, not only in their life, but also in their experiences and their relationships.

I want that for them too. To have wonderful reasons to get out of bed each morning.  To create, to join with the world again, and to live fully.